What Is WeConcile

WeConcile helps motivated couples improve trust, intimacy, safety and connection through established relationship science.

A Tool

Create new outcomes in the fabric of your relationship. WeConcile helps you to communicate and work through complicated issues.

A Journey

WeConcile is a journey you take within yourself and with your partner to rebuild  intimate connections with the most important relationship of your life.


WeConcile is a low cost self help system for committed couples to create deeper and more succesful relationships with each other.

Our Mission 

The mission of WeConcile is to empower its users to improve their important relationships.  Dedication to the long-term benefit of humanity is its primary consideration. 

WeConcile believes that it is service to the higher good of all life without fear which will result in the greatest abundance for all and allow the world we wish to be in to emerge.

In line with this, WeConcile operates from a position of trust and openness, knowing that as the higher good of long term benefit to humanity is our focus, we are demonstrating trust that our own personal welfare will be a by product of that intent.

How Will It Help

WeConcile is a multi faceted program designed to help you and your partner in a number of very intimate and powerful ways.
Read One Couple's Story

Love Is A Garden

Love is what allows us to flourish and blossom. Creating a flourishing loving relationship is similar to growing a garden. A garden requires planning, tilling the soil, planting the seeds, watering and weeding, selecting and appreciating the fruit and flowers.  It requires knowledge of the seasons, meaning what to do when. It requires careful tending and nurturing. It takes patience because it takes time. It takes tenderness because new things are fragile, as are our hearts.

Similarly, tending your relationship takes the same attention. As you progress through WeConcile, your relational abilities will be nurtured. You will learn to tend the garden of your relationship and help it blossom and grow it into the uniquely beautiful thing that it wants to be.

Your Hopes Are Possible

So many of us have this idea that getting married is the fulfillment of our dream and that looking at the hard stuff is the ‘nightmare.’  This couldn’t be further from the truth.  Dreams don’t just happen. Dreams are something we have to build – with focus, commitment and patience.

Without effort, a dream is only an illusion.  It isn’t solid; it doesn’t exist as reality in the here and now.  It exits in the future as a possibility and we can reach it if we develop the skills we need to make it our reality. Successful people and couples analytically figure out what’s not working and then make the changes needed to achieve their goals and dreams. WeConcile gives you a “GPS” to help you get there.

Calm Things Down

Look at the conflict as you understand it. Figure out the pattern that has swallowed up your relationship. Discover the root feelings and wounds that cause negative interactions. Explore the negative pattern as a way of coping with the disruption of safe connection.

Change Your Patterns

Learn to understand your root needs, fears and perceptions about relationships. Learn to share in a way that works. Learn to express your needs and desires

Put It Together

Open up new patterns of relating. Get comfortable, break in the shoe, get real with it. The tools you learn on this journey apply to all of your intimate relationships. You will emerge a different person than the person who started. And your relationship will transform in the process.

Stop Fighting Each Other

Rather than talking about the same old fight over and over, you will be asked to think about the mechanics of that fight, breaking it down, and finding out what is fueling the fight.  We call your conflict dynamic your ‘cycle.’ This knowledge will build as you progress through multiple levels until you have restructured how you relate and greatly reduced your areas of conflict.

Is WeConcile For Us

WeConcile is for couples that want restoration and success

Success iS Based on Many Factors

  • I am willing to be accountable for my actions.
  • I am willing to look at myself.
  • I want to be in my relationship.
  • I want to improve my relationship.
  • I am willing to devote time to learning about myself.
  • I am willing to devote time to learning about my partner.
  • I am willing to devote time to learning about my relationship.
  • I am not in danger of being hurt physically by my partner.
  • My partner is not in danger of being hurt physically by me.
  • I am currently not in an affair.
  • My partner is not currently in an affair.
  • I am not actively abusing alcohol or drugs.
  • My partner is not actively abusing alcohol or drugs.
  • I will respect my partner’s privacy and let him or her share with me, at his or her pace, what he or she wants to share with me from his or her WeConcile learning process.

WeConcile is For You!

Did you see yourself as you read these statements?  They depict a person who has the potential to gain a great deal from WeConcile. If the above statements describe you and your partner, then you will get a lot out of this program.

WeConcile is NOT For You!

If you believe you should leave your relationship, then WeConcile is not the right place to put your time and energy. WeConcile is not designed to help you leave a relationship.

How Long Will IT Take?

Each of the four phases of WeConcile contains six levels or subject areas for a total of 24 areas of learning.

In each level, a couple might spend about 1-hour reading, 1- 2 hours doing exercises and 2+ hours discussing the exercises and learning for a total of 4- 6 hours per level. Some couples move faster.

An example goal would be to complete a level a week when time permits and complete a level every two weeks to three weeks during busier periods. You won’t be allowed to go faster than a level a week – you need time to practice what you’ve learned and integrate it. Going slower may be more productive for you. Following this example schedule, a relationship re- construction process (or project) can take 96 -144 hours or more over the course of 6 months to a year.

Partners need this much time to learn, practice and “rewire” their new learning into a very different and more satisfying relationship experience. As anyone who has done couples therapy knows, there are no shortcuts. Changing our lives and relationships takes not only a commitment but time to change who we are, who we want to be and what our experiences are.

This investment in your relationship will take each of you 100+ hours of your time.

What Will it Take?

In order for WeConcile to help your relationship, both you and your partner will need to embrace some specific ingredient:

  • Desire – I desire to have a more connected and satisfying relationship
  • Commitment – I am committed to my relationship and to improving it
  • Effort – I am willing to put in effort to make my desire a reality
  • Curiosity and self-reflection – I want to know myself and my partner better
  • Time – I am willing to put in the time it takes to improve my relationship

It all starts with desire.  If we desire something, and intend to make it a reality, then it can be done. Do you want a more harmonious and closer connection with your partner?  Actions speak louder than words.  If you are willing to put in the time and effort, and keep your mind open with curiosity and self reflection, then you have the ingredients needed. 

Commitment is a promise or an agreement.  Commitment means that each day you re-commit.  If you get off track, you say to yourself, I am starting again. Commitment means you hold to the promise even when it gets difficult. 

Relationships are hard work. Whether you and your partner get no help at all, see a couples’ therapist regularly or decide to use WeConcile, it is always going to involve some ‘work.’  By work we mean effort: self-reflection, putting words around difficult to describe experiences and feelings, devoting energy and attention to deepen your understanding of yourself and your partner. 

Curiosity and self-reflection
Curiosity is a strong desire to know or learn something – to look inside or self reflect, to wonder why your partner is having the experience he or she is.  Time and time again, our wounds will get activated and we may lose our sense of curiosity. It is imperative to find it again.  Why did I just get upset? Why did my partner? What are the deeper issues that are being activated within each of us?

Self reflection takes the understanding that looking at our self is an important endeavor.  When we realize that our present very much comes out of our past, it is easier to understand the importance of sorting through our history, how it has impacted us and untangle what is going on now. Without curiosity and self reflection, we cannot do this.
WeConcile will take time. Change occurs both through new information allowing for insight and through repetition. Just as gaining a degree or starting a new business takes time, so does reconstructing a relationship and changing old patterns. You are asking to step into a new relational world.  It will take time to create this new reality.  For how long will it take click here:

Not Sure We Want To Stay Together

While it is at times, normal to question staying in your relationship when you are having a rough time, if you are really on the fence about staying in your relationship or are experiencing extreme relationship distress, WeConcile probably won't work for you without a coach. It helps to have an objective third party who cares about your relationship on your team. 

It is important to be committed to working on your relationship, and not ready to walk out the door. And, you have at least a dream that repairing your relationship is possible.

If either of you is not committed to your relationship, Weconcile is not for you.

Couples Therapy vs. WeConcile

Change doesn’t happen in a closed system. Something new has to enter the system for change to occur. This means people struggling in their relationships will need to allow in something new. This could be a number of things. Couples Therapy, WeConcile, a book or workshop or something else.

Whether you choose Couples therapy or WeConcile, sustaining a love that works is an ongoing process in all relationships.  It will be hard work.

  • Getting to know yourself better – the impact of your history and your triggers.
  • Getting to know your partner better and understand their
  • Learning and practicing open and non-defensive communication
  • Changing difficult behavioral cycles
  • Cultivating vulnerability and nurturing

Like Couples Therapy, the purpose of WeConcile is to help you build your intimate relationship into one that is deeply healing, loving and satisfying.

The WeConcile difference is that as a self-help program, it will cost you significantly less. WeConcile is time convenient. You don’t have to drive to an appointment or get childcare. You can learn on your schedule – not someone else’s.

WeConcile’s learning is systemized. You will be guided through step-by-step learning with specific goals for each step.

WeConcile is private. This is an advantage for those who feel uncomfortable with the process of sharing the issues of their most intimate and important relationship with another person. Depending on the therapy rates in your area, you get 2 – 3 months of relationship help for the price of one session with a therapist.

It is not a shortcut. It will most likely be as much work as seeing a couples’ therapist.  It will take time, introspection, vulnerability, courage and communication. 

The advantage of Couples counseling is that it can be very stabilizing to have a skilled therapist working with you. Self-study is not for everyone. For some, having a Couples counselor will make the challenges of improving your relationship easier.

For other couples, using WeConcile while seeing a Couples therapist will offer the most learning and support.

If you are dealing with extreme volatility, active affairs, untreated addiction or any physical or emotional abuse, we recommend that you find a well-trained couples therapist rather than using WeConcile.

Whether you choose WeConcile, Couples therapy or both, we hope your relationship becomes the relationship of your dreams.


The names Are Changed
But These Testimonials Are From Real BETA Users

James & Samantha

When I take the time to look back on how we have changed – it is incredible to see where we were and where we are.  We loved each other before – but we have evolved into a couple in a much more satisfying way.

Agnes & Tom

It has become easier to have conversations that previously would have been avoided or would have led to confrontations.  We are feeling more free to talk about things more openly and honestly (and for me, I have identified a new level of honesty…have started to experience things outside of just my “head.”)  We share things less defensively and are more receptive to hearing (I mean REALLY hearing) the other person’s experiences, points of view, or experiences.  Rather than focusing on being right, we are willing to reach across the facts and connect on the non-logical.

Pat & Andy

Truly we are feeling more confident and more competent in the relationship.  It is feeling more textured and more complete to me.  We still are not always perfectly aligned on all aspects – but we no longer seem to struggle to find a way to discuss it nor does the difference lead to a fight.  We are able to TALK without having it lead to conflict or hard feelings. In fact, we are starting to laugh about or not take personally how we each approach decisions, behave, or interact.  Rather than taking offense or assuming that something is a personal affront purposely being lobbed at the other, we are able to ask questions, share perspectives, and not jump to conclusions.

Charles & Rebecca

Of all of the levels we have received, this one (14) was the one that really felt like we were taking a HUGE step forward. It felt as if the others were evolutionary, and this one was more revolutionary.  As if instead of just stepping up the skills, we bounced up. What I think was the most meaningful for me (and possibly for both of us) was the prescriptiveness of the steps.

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Do Not Wait To Get The Help You Need
WeConcile allows couples to gain access to a revolutionary system designed to rebuild intimacy through a process of personal change for both parties.
  • $60 Monthly Subscription (With a Six Month Commitment Required)
  • Your Membership Empowers Your Relationship at a Fraction of the Cost of Therapy
  • The Coach Guide is Available to Your Therapist or Pastor for Free. Let Them Know.
  • Work on your own and at your own pace – you may also choose to work with your Therapist or Clergy as frequently or infrequently as you like.

You Cannot Fix What You Cannot See