Notes for Season 1 Episode 3 – Divorce’s Impact and Changing Negative Relational Patterns

You can do this exercise alone or with your partner. If you are doing this exercise with your partner, you should each complete it on your own and then use it to discuss and understand more about yourself and each other.

 In this episode, Kirsten talks about how her parent’s divorce impacted her. She discusses how she wasn’t allowed to express her true feelings and she became a people pleaser. She divorced herself after 9 years of marriage due to her husband’s alcohol issues and because she didn’t want her children to witness the level of dysfunction that was occurring in her marriage. Her path of healing has included attending Al-Anon.

Think about the impact your parents had on who you are.

·      Did they stay married or was there a divorce?

·      How did their behavior impact you?

·      What do you wish was different about their marriage or divorce and how you were treated?

·      Were you allowed to express all your feelings?

·      Did you have to sacrifice your authentic self to keep a parent happy?

·      Did you become a people pleaser in any way?

·      Did you develop addiction to avoid feelings?

·      Did you develop excessive caretaking traits because you were raised so that became part of your way of relating?

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